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Gymnasium

by Feeling Small

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lyrics

Youngest in the room, minus volunteers
Not here to perform, but to clear the air
Embarrassed, sure, it’s strange to be alone
So much of the time, then to be on campus
20 minutes in a folding chair, I can only think of me

Gymnasium, gymnasium
Last time I was here was to see a volleyball team
With a thousand plus, cheering maskless

In 2013, I craved every new thing
Thought I had just been blessed, Shakey knew I was a mess
And in a Cleveland lot, in a way I hadn’t felt
Ali showed me what I was, on a hard drive full of love
Erik’s got that shot somewhere, on a hard drive full of love

In Richmond, in June, my favorite aunt felt it too
Said I had to slow down, said I wasn’t alone
I knew I could be a poet, I wrote thousands of lines
That only made sense in my manic fortress design
Headstrong, focused, unwilling to concede
I was obsessed by change, but couldn’t face my need to
The windshield was a theatre, each city a greatest hit
Every stranger I encountered, I knew I could convince
On my future indie memoir of the famous floors I’d slept on
It felt like I was cheating if we booked one smoking single
Trav made an appointment and it felt so out of bounds
I wouldn’t listen to anyone I hadn’t just met
I’d take two Vivarin, then volunteer to drive
Cue Ben Lerner’s PennSound, wait for fragments to unite
Use the deprivation as an asset to my style

And as the bud of sky opened, it felt like I had won
If I had met the sun twice before calling one day done
Smoking through the morning, drinking in the afternoon
I read all Nick Hornby’d written just to finish one thing
And when it got dark, I’d go out and prove
I was good, even better than I had been ever
I was good, even better than I had been ever
I was good, even better than I had been ever

credits

released May 2, 2023
ELECTRIC BASS - MAX COLONNA
SAMPLER - JOHN MICHAEL LANDON
BACKING VOCAL - GRACE ROWLAND
ELECTRIC GUITAR, VOCAL - CHASE WEINACHT

ENGINEERED, PRODUCED & MIXED BY JOHN MICHAEL LANDON
RECORDED AT ESTUARY RECORDING, AUSTIN, TX
MASTERED BY MAX LORENZEN AT RARE EAR
2020 - 2022

ARTWORK PHOTO BY ERIK GATLING
ARTWORK EDIT & CONCEPT BY ERIK GATLING & EMRE ERDENER

SONG & LYRICS BY CHASE WEINACHT
Everyone who played on this wrote their own parts.

Select All Delete Records, May 2, 2023

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Feeling Small Austin, Texas

Feeling Small is a new vehicle for the songs of Chase Weinacht (Marmalakes). Dressed by a rotating cast of players from the Austin community, then hemmed and fastened by producer John Michael Landon, these vulnerable, delicate song shapes reveal an inconsistent pursuit of personal growth. ... more

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